Saturday, May 27, 2006

A Remission of Sorts...

A few posts ago I related some of my thoughts regarding my opinions of high school reunions, especially in light of my impending one. While I attempt to utilize this forum as a place to sometimes vent, journal, hopefully offer something compelling, or whatever, in hindsight I did make some statements that could be misconstrued and misunderstood. A dear friend of mine responded and I've taken her thoughts to heart. Let me make a few statements here regarding this.

First, I struggle with my place in life. As much as I attempt to eschew attachments, things, and BS notions of success and happiness, I am still human and struggle with these things. While I love and am proud of my place as a husband and father, I do still struggle with the idea of having not "arrived" yet in the career area of my life. I struggle with the idea of still working a retail postion at the age of 29. I wonder what the rest of my life holds for me as I finish up my degree and so forth. So, some of my frustration with the idea of the reunion comes from not a rejection of the people there, but perhaps from some inner insecurities.

Second, as my friend pointed out, we have all changed drastically since high school. Life has a great tendency to do that. I am certainly not the same person that I was twelve years ago and neither are they. Without a doubt, the power of the cliques and requisite High School USA groups has faded. We have all fallen into the world of approaching thirty, parenthood, and so forth. I do not reject this idea, nor think that I would find myself in a place with nothing in common with these people. There is the very real possibility that some new relationships might be spurred on and old friendships reignited.

In short, I apologize, especially to those who do look forward to such reunion experiences. I will most likely attend my reunion and will have a great time. I do hope to have some things to show for my life career-wise by that time but if not, oh well. Money is money. Things are things. I have the love of a wonderful wife, soon to be two children, and the Creator of the Universe. That's not too bad a resume to bring back home.

2 comments:

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